I hope that you had a lovely Christmas and are enjoying a fantastic start to 2017. Things at the Dugger home are good now, but boy was New Year’s Eve rough. For starters, I was sick, but in the afternoon my husband and I got into an argument right before he left to watch a football game with a friend. He was intentional about coming home before midnight, but I met him with little more than a cold shoulder. My passive aggressive nature wanted to be asleep before he came back, but the Lord convicted my attitude. However, I wasn’t as kind as the Lord was wanting. As we got into bed, Jason reached for my hand and began praying,
Dear Lord, thank you for 2016…
To which I silently thought, Good riddance, what a horrible year!
My husband’s words interrupted my internal temper tantrum,
And my husband went on praising the Lord for His faithfulness throughout the year.
How could I have forgotten so quickly everything great that happened in 2016 simply because the last few hours were rough?
I tend to focus on the negative, challenging, and temporary rather than remembering the good and the victories. I focus on myself rather than on God. In the Bible, if often states that the Israelites complained against Moses,
They said to Moses, “Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt? ~ Exodus 14:11
In the desert the whole community grumbled against Moses and Aaron. ~ Exodus 16:2
But the people were thirsty for water there, and they grumbled against Moses. They said, “Why did you bring us up out of Egypt to make us and our children and livestock die of thirst?” ~ Exodus 17:3
All the Israelites grumbled against Moses and Aaron, and the whole assembly said to them, “If only we had died in Egypt! Or in this wilderness!” ~ Numbers 14:2
But really, they weren’t grumbling against Moses as much as they were complaining against God.
Moses himself says this in Exodus 16:7-8, “Who are we, that you should grumble against us? … Who are we? You are not grumbling against us, but against the Lord.”
Moses was appointed to lead the Israelites; my husband has been appointed by God to lead me. New Year’s Eve was a good reminder that when I grumble against my husband, I’m actually grumbling against God. Jason can say one insensitive comment, and I forget the years of kindness spoken. He can come home late from work and instead of thanking him for providing for our family, I gripe about his inability to leave on time. He can upset me, and suddenly I’m shooting daggers out of my eyes at him rather than communicating in a healthy manner.
In Numbers 11, the Lord destroyed the outer edges of the Israelites camp after they began complaining once again. The Lord takes our grumblings very seriously.
When our husbands do something wrong, we shouldn’t forget all the things they have done right.
We shouldn’t forget God’s goodness even when we can’t see good in our husbands.
We all married sinners who will continue to do wrong for the rest of their lives. We too are sinners who will do wrong daily. If we allow their mistakes to rule our thoughts, we will start by creating a grumpy atmosphere in our homes and end with grumbling against God. However, if we can remember their strengths, goodness, faithfulness, and kindness, we will smile more and sulk less. If we could see our husbands through the eyes of Jesus, we will learn to love them with His everlasting love.
The LORD appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you. ~ Jeremiah 31:3
I want to be a wife who worships God and celebrates my husband rather than one who complains and gripes.
Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. ~ Proverbs 21:9
Do you consider grumbling against your husband similar to complaining against God?
The New Year is an excellent time to start For the Love of Our Husbands: 52 Devotions for Wives and Prayers for the Men They Love. Visit my store to learn more and order yours. Thank you for supporting this ministry.